Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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