I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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