she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
