My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
