there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
