so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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