I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
