She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
