Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Randomize
