There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
