can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
