I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
