I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize