i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
