I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
