Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
So vagazzling was a success
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
