two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
