im about as happy as oj after his trial
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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