Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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