she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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