At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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