Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Randomize
