so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
