I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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