gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
jump out the window naked night went bad
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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