Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
