Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize