doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Randomize
