So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Randomize
