just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
this will be a night to untag.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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