I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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