I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
