Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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