I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
