Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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