Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
