kristin has been a bad kristin
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
