Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize