then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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