Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
