You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
