why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
