So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Quick, to the slutcave!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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