he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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