I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
