Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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