i can't believe i had my finger in that
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize