I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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