i would punch a child for taco bell
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Randomize
