k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize