I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Randomize