he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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